It’s Only My Opinion: Pulling the Plug on GH’s Drew and Stories Not Working on Y&R, B&B, DAYS, and BTG
With all of the storylines that soaps are telling at any given time, odds are that some aren’t going to connect with the audience. Carolyn Hinsey takes a look at some tales on General Hospital, Young and Restless, Days of Our Lives, Beyond the Gates and Bold and Beautiful that are missing the mark, like Luna Part Two on B&B, and Hayley’s extremely leisurely murder of Bill on BTG.
The End
When should a soap pull the plug on a story that’s not working? As soon as possible.
Mariah’s story on Y&R has been going nowhere since last spring, which is an interminable amount of time on a soap opera. She abandoned her wife, Tessa, and daughter, Aria, may have killed a man, checked into a psychiatric hospital, and, most recently, hallucinated her former captor, Ian Ward. He “advised” her to kidnap Abby and Devon’s son Dominic (for whom Mariah was the surrogate), which came out of left field since the kid wasn’t even onscreen.
Mariah: “Why can’t I just take Aria?”
Ian: “You only adopted her because you missed Dominic so deeply. Dominic came from your flesh, just as you came from your mother. It is with you he belongs. It was you who spoke to him in the womb.”
Mariah: “Abby loves him.”
Ian: “You loved him first.”
What? Nothing in this story makes sense. Not Ian Ward reappearing. Not the mentally ill Mariah playing “I Spy” with Dominic. Not Sharon, a trained therapist, allowing her daughter to languish in the loony bin for months without checking on her. And certainly not Y&R breaking up their only gay couple for this nonsense.
Bring in a handsome shrink to counsel Mariah (and be an eligible male for Audra, Sally, Victoria, Phyllis, Lily) and have Mariah walk in on Tessa in bed with Daniel. It’s time to put the soap back in this soap opera!
Ditto some of the stories on DAYS. Are we really watching three of Salem’s most dynamic women — who have over 160 years combined working on this show — read a book? A man named Foster hosted the widows’ book club at his bookstore, and it wasn’t as much devilish fun as we’re used to with Marlena’s stories.
Marlena (walking out): “I’m not ready.”
Julie: “Oh God, what have I done?”
Maggie: “It’s as we suspected. It’s too soon for her.”
Foster: “She did read the book, and she listened. She’ll be back.”
I hope not. Watching Marlena mope around town is not a story, so I hope she’s involved in the “Stefano is dead” tale that just launched. DAYS whiffed with the arc of the DiMera offspring being held captive in the crypt (Peter did it and died, ho hum), so they doubled down and decided to officially kill the patriarch.
Rafe: “The bones belong to your father.”
EJ: “He was The Phoenix. You could never rule out that he would rise again.”
Kristen: “I killed Peter with Father’s femur?”
Apparently. Marlena was Stefano’s “Queen of the Night,” so it would make sense for him to start appearing to her. And what about a funeral?
Johnny: “Such an undignified end for him. Maybe there’s something we can do about that.”
What can we do about newcomer Dylan on B&B? They’re shoehorning her into Will and Electra’s romance with some of the hokiest scenes since Sheila fed her toe to a bear.
There was Will, home alone with his house guest, Dylan, encouraging her to ballet dance, complete with leotard, toe shoes and classical music that Will conveniently had ready to play so she could twirl in front of him. Well, not in front of him. Dylan danced with her back to Will so she could face the camera while doing all those pliés and relevés (terms I only know from an old I Love Lucy episode).
It’s Luna 2.0: A strange girl comes into their orbit and develops a fascination with Will, which makes Electra jealous and causes problems. B&B has never established why we should root for Will and Electra, other than them being wildly attractive young people from prominent families. How did Luna’s drama affect their relationship? Why is Electra still living at Eric’s while Dylan bunks with her boyfriend? How was Ivy too sick to go on that important business trip but not too sick to spy on Will and Dylan from the bushes?
Ivy: “My sweet, trusting, giving niece is out of town and you’re making moves!”
Dylan: “What?”
Ivy: “You were alone with Will in the main house. Electra’s boyfriend. I saw everything, Miss Dylan. I will not let you get away with trying to steal Electra’s boyfriend. Leave L.A. and never come back.”
Can you say overkill? Fill in the blanks with meaningful story points, not Electra’s aunt acting like Natasha from Rocky and Bullwinkle. Luna tortured Will, and Dylan killed her. The heart-to-heart they shared about the Luna nightmare they both endured makes so much more sense than Dylan performing Swan Lake in the living room.
It would also make sense for BTG to call time of death on Bill and Hayley’s marriage. Her repeated efforts to kill her husband risk dumbing down one of the smartest (and hottest) men in Fairmont Crest.
Hayley (bragging to Randy): “I’ll be sobbing at his funeral long before he knows something is wrong.”
See, that’s wrong. The show is doing a good job showing Bill regrets having divorced Dani, explaining to Tomas that Dani was “ferocious” when he married her, but over time forgave his lies and let him win every battle.
Bill: “It’s painfully ironic. Everything she did for me is exactly what pushed me away.”
Dani’s got her groove back now, and Bill got downright misty with his former father-in-law reminiscing about the years he was Dupree adjacent.
Vernon: “You came this close to swallowing our family whole, but you have no power over us anymore.”
Bill: “I think I made a mistake leaving Dani.”
Vernon: “Damn straight you did.”
If Bill is wise enough to admit that, surely his spidey senses must tingle every time Hayley insists he drink that fakakta “wellness tea” she’s poisoning. Seriously, BTG: Call it.
Like GH did with Drew after he had been written into such a villainous corner he was basically a walking (limping?) cartoon. Once Willow’s trial resolved, they filled that dramatic hole with a blizzard that trapped unlikely people in (mostly) interesting situations.
Top of the list were Tracy and Martin, stranded together in Drew’s house after she snuck in to retrieve the belongings Drew stole from her. They got into a surprising conversation about love after Martin told Tracy she ruined his life by spearheading his breakup with Lucy.
Martin: “The love of Luke’s life was my sister Laura. Doesn’t that bother you?”
Tracy: “What Luke had with Laura had nothing to do with me.”
Martin: “You had a great love, and you lost him. Now you’re taking out that pain on the rest of the world.”
Fair point. Elsewhere, Molly and Cody shared their 900th misunderstanding (yawn), Jason and Britt got busy, Lulu kissed Nathan, and Charlotte and Danny smooched. Yes, they’re “kissing cousins” and no, it doesn’t bother me. Second cousins once removed (that means a generation apart) is the same relationship Queen Elizabeth II had to her husband, Prince Philip. A quick Google search reports that second cousins share little DNA, “making the risk of genetic issues in children similar to that of unrelated individuals.” The real drama there will come when Alexis and Valentin find out (!).
Speaking of drama, Carly and fugitive Valentin sharing a drink in front of a roaring fire during the blizzard was surprisingly hot.
Carly: “You were going to find Charlotte, or die trying. You’re not who I thought you were.”
Valentin: “You’re not who I thought you were, either.”
Could that be the payoff for GH pulling the plug on Anna and Valentin back in 2024? Way to make us wait…
Hey. It’s only my opinion.
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