DAYS’s Chanel (Raven Bowens, far l.), B&B’s Luna (Lisa Yamada), Y&R’s Ian (Ray Wise) and GH’s Michael (Chad Duell) helped drive the soap action last week.

The Best

General Hospital: Sasha Tells Michael She’s Pregnant

The “tequila-infused” one-night stand that occurred after Sasha discovered her boyfriend Cody was her biological cousin and Michael learned his wife Willow had been smooching his uncle produced an unintended but very soapy consequence: Sasha got pregnant. She seemed determined to keep it a secret (and leave town) until Michael summoned her to his office for a confab about his upcoming custody battle with Willow. “I’m pregnant,” Sasha blurted out.

Michael said all the right things, offering to be there for her and to support her financially. But Sasha cited Sonny’s ties to organized crime and the Quartermaines’ habit of making family squabbles a blood sport as her reasons for wanting to raise the baby away from his family. She made good points, so Michael agreed to stay out of her life on one condition: That she stay in Port Charles. Okay, nodded Sasha, asserting she will raise the baby in a happy, healthy home. “If I had to get accidentally pregnant,” she smiled, “I’m glad it’s with you.”

Michael’s family might disagree….

Young and Restless: Jordan and Ian Strike

All we knew about Jordan and Ian’s revenge plot was that the maniacal duo spent a lot of time arguing in motel rooms and had something to do with Heather’s murder — until New Year’s Eve, when Ian drugged Tessa’s drink at Society and Jordan chloroformed Sharon in a parking lot. Mariah came upon her wife having a medical emergency and was joined by Nick and Faith, all horrified to see Mariah’s former cult leader/kidnapper back in town. Ian claimed to have “saved” Tessa, which they didn’t buy for a second. He headed back to the motel to find Sharon bound and gagged and Jordan accusing him of trying to “play” her.

“Can I lay this whole thing out for you?” began Ian. (Yes please, responded confused viewers.) The plan is to send Sharon to a “watery grave,” which will leave Mariah grief-stricken at the loss of her mother. Ian will then step in as the caring father figure he once was to Mariah now that he’s supposedly been rehabilitated in prison. The next step will be closing in on Claire to get Jordan’s niece back in her life. It all seemed very far-fetched until Ian revealed who they plan to blame for their crimes: Phyllis.

“The hate for Sharon that Phyllis harbors in her heart will be her undoing,” vowed Ian. Everyone in Genoa City is well acquainted with that hatred — so Red better watch her back.

Bold and Beautiful: Will Rescues Electra

Finally! After months of Electra cluelessly wondering who had made deep fake photos of her head on a naked body, she stumbled onto a wall of the offending pics in her “friend” Remy’s apartment and went oh! Remy gave Electra a twisted speech about how he did it because he loves her; Electra escaped and ran into the street with Remy in hot pursuit. Just then, Will called her and she screamed, “It’s Remy!” so he told her to send him her location and he jumped on a motorcycle (instead of, you know, calling the police). Will caught up with Electra just as Remy had her cornered on a ledge and yelled the obligatory “Let her go!” Electra shoved Remy and raced into Will’s arms, allowing her stalker to escape.

The duo resurfaced at Forrester Creations where their story spilled out to a horrified Ivy, Katie, Brooke, Carter and Hope. The execs apologized for firing Electra (because they thought she had willingly posed for the pics) and the young lovebirds retired to an office to process their ordeal. “I couldn’t lose you,” gushed Will before kissing her.

Nothing fake about that!

Days of Our Lives: Chanel Dumps Johnny

The minute Johnny grabbed Joy to chastise her for coming to the DiMera New Year’s Eve party you knew it wasn’t going to end well. First of all, he did it at midnight which guaranteed his wife Chanel would come looking for him. Second, they choose that moment to rehash their night together and Joy used her outside voice to declare, “If Chanel knew what happened between you and me…” In walked Chanel to demand the whole story.

And she got it. Johnny relayed that it started when he thought Chanel was cheating on him with Alex and he went to drown his sorrows at Small Bar where he met Joy. Wait, said Chanel, Johnny met Joy on the set of Body and Soul — Chanel was there! Nope: They pretended to not know each other because they had fooled around. Johnny apologized, called it a big mistake and begged forgiveness. Thwack! responded Chanel with a slap across his face. ”You called me a cheating slut?” she reminded him before storming out.

Next up: Confronting Joy.

The Worst

GH: Drew and Willow Go To Washington

Politicians aren’t known for making sound personal decisions (!) so it wasn’t a huge surprise when newly elected congressman Drew Quartermaine asked his married lover Willow to accompany him to his swearing-in ceremony. But what was Willow’s excuse? Her custody battle with Michael is heating up — and there’s a video out there of her and his uncle Drew having sex — so accompanying him to DC with Wiley didn’t exactly scream responsible parent.

“I’m not sure it’s a good idea,” demurred Willow at first, citing her recent separation and fear that their affair might become public. Does Drew want a scandal before he even takes office? He didn’t care. Drew just wanted to spend a “really important moment” with the people who matter to him, meaning Willow and her son (along with his daughter Scout, who we have barely seen since Sam died).

As it turned out, it wasn’t a good idea. Michael saw a tabloid photo of Willow and Drew together in DC and called Diane to tell her Willow had taken Wiley without his permission. Advantage: Michael. But the stupidity of Willow’s decision was captured best by Nina who eye rolled, “What could be more appropriate than Drew putting his hand on a bible while my married daughter stares at him with stars in her eyes?”

B&B: Bill Springs Luna From Prison

That’s some crack prison system they’ve got in B&B’s version of L.A., huh? Luna murdered Tom and Hollis to keep them from spilling the secret that Bill Spencer wasn’t her father and she framed her mother Poppy for the crimes. Eventually the truth came out, and Luna went to jail. She started writing letters to Bill who visited her in prison and found her covered in bruises from what she said were beatings. Bill then asked Luna to lay out all the details of the murders, which she did.

Cut to Luna being released to Bill’s care. “I made a deal with the authorities,” said Bill cryptically. He wasn’t going to “go into details” but Luna is now on house arrest and can’t leave Bill’s estate or see anyone. Bill went on to ruminate that Luna had been the product of a rocky upbringing just like he was and he wanted to give her stability — which has nothing to do with how a confessed murderer could be so easily released from jail (never mind that Luna also kidnapped Steffy Forrester and locked her in a cage).

“I’m confused,” said Luna. Us, too!