The Secret Blog of an Oakdale Bartender
That’s right, Soap Opera Weekly has found the link to a secret weblog community where some of Oakdale’s service professionals share their gripes and air their customer’s dirty laundry. Keep on reading for some candid comments. And remember: Always tip at least 20 percent!
Nov. 14: Mr. Frasier got punched in the face today. LOL! Most excitement we’ve had here in weeks! Too bad none of us had popcorn. Sure, the guy tips well, but he made fun of our uniforms on his first day back in town. You do not diss the gold and green. I don’t care if I look like a walking pool table.
Nov. 15: Ms. Ryan came in and ordered two mimosas before 10 a.m. Debating giving her printed cards of the AA prayer before remembering I gave them all to Henry last week. Suspect that Henry made them into the origami panda bear I found in the tip jar this morning.
Nov. 16: Mr. Frasier was back today, requesting some special table for him and a lady friend. Lady friend turned out to be Carly Snyder, who scrubs a mean pot. If only I could get Jose the busboy to stop writing epic poems about her “delicate dishpan hands.”
Nov. 17: Mrs. Grimaldi told me to stop updating my blog at work or she’ll take away my Palm. Whatever. Doesn’t she realize this place is only busy between 2 and 3 during the week? How does she keep this place afloat? Mob money?
Nov. 19: Lost $50 to Henry in the weekly kitchen poker game. I think he cheats.
Nov. 20: Mrs. Grimaldi was talking to Lily Snyder about the state of things in the “bedroom department” today. I do not get paid enough to listen to stuff like that. I checked out this cute blonde walking by and pretended I was deaf. I think the cute blonde is seeing Mrs. Snyder’s husband. Do I get paid enough to care? Nah.
Nov. 22: Mr. Montgomery is here with his daughter. He gives me the creeps. Dr. M, though? She’s cute. Kind of reminds me of Bambi. Wait, Bambi’s a male deer, right? That’s what Jose the busboy just told me. What kind of name is “Bambi” for a boy? That’s stupid. Probably scarred him for life.
Nov. 29: Ms. Ryan and her son came in today. The one who changes his hair every week, not the ex-nutjob. They ordered mimosas and toasted them. What is that about? Oh, wait, there’s the hot redheaded nurse that works at Memorial. I feel better now. This is a family place, but not that way. At least that’s what Mrs. Grimaldi keeps saying.
Nov. 30: Found Henry curled up behind the bar this morning. He denies that he’s been living here. I think he’s lying. This would explain why the liquor levels in my wells are always low. Told Henry he owes me money. He made himself a screwdriver (before 10 a.m.) and promised he’d have it for me before Sunday’s game.
Dec. 2: Watched Bambi. Cried my eyes out. So embarrassed.
Log on in a few weeks for “Grounded for Life: Confessions of a Java Barista.”
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