Who Am I?
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QUESTIONS
1. I was born in Springfield, but you didn’t meet me until I was older. I have held a lot of jobs; my first one as an adult was as co-owner of an antique shop. I lived in Florida for a time (in fact, you even saw me vacation there), but I returned to Springfield several years ago. One of my strong points is impersonation: I’ve adopted several different identities over the years.
2. I was a no-good schemer back in the day, but the love of my wife helped turn me into the (relatively) upstanding citizen I am today. I’ve been engaged five times, but have only married two different women. I was once a co-owner of WSPR, but now you more often find me in front of the camera rather than behind the scenes. I once shot — accidentally, of course — my current wife.
3. I was born in Springfield, although my parents were not married to each other at the time. After a tumultuous childhood, I spent most of my formative years in boarding schools. I’ve had several careers, but probably have spent the most time doing public relations. As for romance, I slept with (some I even married) a Bauer, a Spaulding, a Cooper and a Marler.
4. Yup, I, too, was born in Springfield. (My parents changed my name soon after I was born.) As a child, I bonded with many adults and fellow peers, but I did run away once when life was tough. I spent some time in Europe and returned to Springfield when I was older. As an adult, I’ve helped someone I love fake their own death. I have dated a cousin — don’t worry, it didn’t get very far — and, in general, I tend to fall for men who come to my rescue. I’ve been in life-or-death situations more than once when my shining knight-turned-future lover saved the day.
5. Fans saw my parents fall in and out love, then welcome me into the world. My mom raised me until she died. As a teenager, I studied German. A well-played poker game led me to have sex for the first time. Of course, I haven’t had that much luck in love: I’ve been divorced four times.
Conversation
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