Okay, this is why I can’t be nice to GH very often: because the VERY next day, it does me wrong like a country song. I wish I could say "I like what I've seen so far of nuKristina," but since "what I've seen so far" involves a teenager in her boy shorts and bra in front of Jason...I can't.

Dude, I think I've blogged every day this week. Go, me! And today, I actually have overwhelmingly positive things to say. Not only that, but they're positive things about GENERAL HOSPITAL, which I know I'm usually not so complimentary towards. So, to kick things off: I love newcomer Drew Garrett as Michael!

I'm glad I can always count on my co-workers to get me through especially trying episodes of my shows. Joe and I "live-blogged" some of today's ATWT ... purely by accident, because we couldn't stop e-mailing each other in morbid fascination. This is dedicated to Bonnie; she knows why! (Or, actually, given her lack of mental acuity today, maybe she doesn't.)

Oh, hell, no. Yes, that's not the best way to kick off a blog entry, but sometimes, "Oh, hell, no," is really the most eloquent way to sum up how one feels — especially when it comes to B&B and the revelation of what ammo Bill has against Eric.

Today, AS THE WORLD TURNS’ Damian and Meg both came down with that rare strain of flu that forces your shirt to come off for no apparent reason. Why can't we get THAT epidemic here in New York instead of H1N1 (aka "swine flu")? I mean, historically, PASSIONS had a major case of the Shirtless Flu. Remember DAYS OF OUR LIVES' Patrick Lockhart (Brody Hutzler)? Chronic sufferer! But I have to admit it was funny to be trying to work and then suddenly look up to see Meg whipping her shirt off while Damian turned his back. I actually had to e-mail Joe to see if I missed something, and he wrote back, "She somehow got it wet — apparently from crying so profusely. Or maybe drooling over Damian." LOL!

So GH's Ethan was conceived roughly around the time Robert was involved in the Mr. Big story with Burt Ramsey ... AND around the time Lulu was born? Hey, GH writers, that's the mid-80s versus 1994. I know Lulu was rapidly aged, but you can't mess with established points in show history without fans noticing. (Of course the whole Ethan/Luke paternity storyline is one giant rewrite, so what's one more glaring crime against classic GH, right?)

We've been getting a lot of e-mail answers to our 20 Most Fascinating Couples poll, which is really cool! I love it when people are motivated to tell us what they like and don't like. (Hi, GH's Liaison fans: you can stop now. LOL!) But one thing I've noticed is some criticism that we didn't include Bo and Hope from DAYS OF OUR LIVES or GENERAL HOSPITAL's Luke and Laura on the list, as well as couples like AW's Mac and Rachel. To this concern, I would like to remind readers that our parameters were couples created between 1989 and 2009: the years Weekly has been "alive."

Okay, people: the habit of whipping out white candles every time someone has The Sex on soaps has officially gotten utterly ridiculous. SPOILER ALERT for today's ATWT, so don't scroll any further if you don't want to know. Pardon me while I wax poetic before my ire about this tapers off...

I don't know what's worse, being unable to get Journey's "Don't Stop Believin'" out of my head (thank you, FOX's GLEE!) or racking my brain trying to figure out who Eileen Davidson's characters in Dial Emmy For Murder might be based on. Now, the talented Y&R star says she hasn't modeled them after anyone she knows, so that could be my problem. But still! What's the fun in believing that? Much of my enjoyment of both her debut novel and its spankin' new sequel comes from the hilarious soap opera in-jokes and that sense that you know this world that her savvy and often in-over-her-head heroine, Alexis is navigating. Davidson also has great comic timing and there are a lot of lines that made me giggle-snort whilst on the subway.

I am having random soap thoughts and don't know where to put them. Thank goodness I have a blog for this sort of thing!

•We had a Mr. Pants and now a Mr. Quick. What's with the random nouns and adjectives as surnames, ATWT? Hath the naming well truly gone dry? What's next? Mr. Adverb? Mr. Dangling Participle?