John-Paul Lavoisier: I’m going to be doing my laundry for the second time this year on Thursday, because it’s my only day off this week.
Soap Opera Weekly: What, you have 60 pairs of underwear?
Lavoisier: No.
Weekly: So, you’re going commando?
Lavoisier: I’m not going to wear one pair of underwear a day and then put it in the wash. I’m a clean boy. I shower every day. One pair of underwear is not dirty after a couple of hours.
Weekly: Do you go to the gym? What about your gym clothes?
Lavoisier: I do go to the gym. I will say, I have close to 60 T-shirts. I have a lot of T-shirts.
Weekly (to Robert S. Woods): He’s doing laundry for the second time this year on Thursday?
Woods: It’s about time.
Lavoisier: How many times have you worn a pair of underwear before you put it in the wash?Woods: Once.
Lavoisier: Come on, are you serious?
Woods: Yeah. I learned this from Nathan Purdee (ex-Hank): If you’re on a cross-country trip, you stop at Wal-Mart and buy new underwear and then throw the others away.
Weekly: So, you wear underwear once and put it in the wash like a normal person?
Woods: That’s my goal.
Lavoisier: Do you feel that you’re so dirty that you need to? Because you don’t. You don’t wear a T-shirt once and put it in the wash.
Woods: You don’t?
Lavoisier: All right, you know what? I would like to thank all of you for wasting our water!
Woods: Ok, yeah, because we don’t have much of it. I know JP’s a tidy guy, so I’m figuring that he owns maybe five, six, seven times the amount of underwear that I do, so he only has to do laundry every six months.
Lavoisier: I probably own about 30 pair of underwear.
Woods: I think I have a dozen.
Lavoisier: Okay, so I have three times that. And I’ve got some boxer shorts. Come on, people! You don’t wear a T-shirt once and put it in the wash. That is wasteful. If you have the money and you have the time, do it. But it’s wasteful, nonetheless.
Weekly: Is that why your shirt’s inside out?
Lavoisier: No, that’s because this is an Eagles T-shirt and I don’t like the sport. My father’s into these shirts.
Woods: That’s the NFL! You’re in Blondie’s — a sports bar! Take it off and turn it right side out. You’ll be a big hit.
Weekly: Especially if it’s clean.