From Mala Bhattacharjee

Tuning in to Monday's soaps was painful on multiple levels, folks. First, there was the whole death of Ji Min on Y&R. I'm in mourning for the only contract Asian actor on daytime; I will not lie. So, while I was sniffling away and laughing at Jill and Cane repeating Ji Min's god-awful chemist joke (Why do chemists like nitrates? 'Cause they're cheaper than day rates.) I was struck by a second bout of grief — of the "Good grief!" variety.

I don't know about anybody else, but if I talked back to my parents the way Noah Newman talks to Nick and Sharon, they would've slapped the sass out of me. (Metaphorically speaking, of course.) Soap children are cute when they're under the age of three. The way Noah argues with everything his parents say and is rewarded with Nick calling him "Buddy," and offering to pay him $5 an hour to babysit Summer is hardly must-see TV. Don't moms have to deal with that enough in real-life without having to watch it onscreen?

On the bright side, at least Noah isn't asking Nick to kill people like GH's Michael. Do we really have to watch a sprightly little redhead with braces order HITS? When I was that age, I was asking Dad to kill spiders. "You have to kill them, Dad....you have to make them pay."

PAST OPINIONS
September 5, 2007
September 4, 2007