IN OUR OPINION

Stacy Haiduk (ex-Hannah)

— ABC

January 15, 2008

From Joe Diliberto
ALL MY CHILDREN nutjob Hannah wriggled out of Zach's grasp, and Miller Falls claimed another victim. It was almost two more corpses, but Aidan, Greenlee and Kendall managed to pull Zach to safety. Honestly, with the falls notching a body count that would make Hannibal Lecter proud, one would think Pine Valley authorities would erect some sort of railing to protect visitors. Maybe a sign: "Warning: Do Not Fall Off Falls." I have visited Niagara Falls, and they have fences. And signs. What are irresponsible PV public safety officials doing? Especially since stumblebums like Hannah seem to go out of their way to play at the precipice. Who knows how many people have vanished off-camera, but consider just the people we know have plunged to their doom in the mists. Remember Leo and his mother, Vanessa — who, coincidentally, was also mentally unbalanced with a shocking criminal side. Leo pulled his mother over the edge (just like Sherlock Holmes and Moriarty) to prevent her from committing a murder. (Do two wrongs make a right in this case?) At the time, Leo was married to Greenlee, who just happened to witness the falls claiming its latest victim. No one will blame poor Greens if she goes catatonic the next time anyone mentions "water" or "falls." Of course, since nobody's body has ever truly been recovered, Derek and the rest of the local constabulary could argue that no one has conclusively died, but isn't that more of an argument to augment the PVPD dive team? Perhaps someone (Jack?) can get elected mayor on a platform of idiot-proofing Miller Falls. That would help the local criminal population and cut down on dumb plots.

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IN OUR OPINION

January 15, 2008

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