The new fall season is getting under way in stages, and I have to say that the new shows I have started watching are not exactly blowing my socks off.

AS THE WORLD TURNS's Jack and Carly got married yesterday for, like, the 17th time and, thanks to cancellation, fans can be pretty sure that it will stick this time. But what caught my attention about their 42nd stroll down the aisle was that the vows Jack and Carly wrote for themselves focused quite a bit on the negative.

Allow me to interrupt the death spiral of AS THE WORLD TURNS in order to praise Van Hansis' turn as Luke in the demise of Dr. Reid Oliver.

The 62nd Primetime Emmys was kind of like a horse race last night: It started out really strong, moved at a gallop, then faded badly in the final turn, before finishing with a favorite and a dark horse in the winner's circle.

What does GENERAL HOSPITAL have against Brook Lynn? She was brought back to Port Charles as a hired...er, gun to break up Lulu and Dante by sleeping with him (and documenting it). Already hounded by charges of credit-card fraud, Brook accepted the job as a prostitute. Then, yesterday, she became something worse than a scam artist/hooker: She became a would-be rapist, stopped just short of her goal.

So...that was it? After weeks and weeks and weeks of hype that culminated in surrendering an entire afternoon's programming to reruns, GENERAL HOSPITAL refrained from revealing Vanessa Marcil Giovinazzo's face until the very last seconds of Wednesday's episode. And when she finally did appear, Ms. Brenda Barrett did not speak a single word!

I usually try to avoid any and all spoilers before seeing a thriller, so I went into Angelina Jolie's spy flick, Salt, with blinders on. (And, never fear, I won't spoil anything here.) I knew the plot concerned a CIA operative accused of being a Russian sleeper agent, and I was determined not to ruin any surprise.

"You're a gifted liar, Sonny," GENERAL HOSPITAL's Olivia noted. "Just don't lie to me now," she pleaded as she demanded to know if he planted the explosive in Johnny's car.

GENERAL HOSPITAL observed Monday's Independence Day holiday with another rerun of its most infamous recent episode, the Jan. 29 installment in which Sonny shot Dante.

If you're looking for an over-the-top, fun action movie this weekend, why not try The A-Team? If the big-screen adaptation of the iconic 1980s TV series seems to be struggling a bit at the box office, there is one person nobody can blame: Brian Bloom, who formerly played AS THE WORLD TURNS' Dusty. Bloom not only features in The A-Team as cold-fish bad guy Pike (Get it?), he also co-wrote the screenplay! What more do you want the guy to do — sell you popcorn in the lobby?